Dog Costume for daughter bought after Christmas on clearance at Target: $11.99

Swiffer Duster handle and extra swiffer pads: $5.99

Nearly causing an auto accident outside my house when a passing driver caught a glimpse of a lunatic in a dog costume dusting windowsills and nearly steered into an oncoming car: Priceless!

You should have seen her face!

Online shopping trip to Old Navy to buy two pairs of new “flirt cut” pants: $35.50 

Discovering I lost no weight during the great Olestra incident of 2008: disappointing

Yummy Girl Scout Cookies on break room table at work: FREE!!!

Trying on new pants to discover they call attention to my second ass and squeeze the fat around my middle thereby creating the dreaded “muffin top”: Priceless 

Lost pay from taking sick day out of work: $104.00 

Cold medicine and pack of purse sized tissues: $11.34

Driving to work and sneezing entire contents of congested sinuses onto sleeve of my black wool coat:  Priceless

Taking daughter shopping for Clearance aisle kitty and doggie costumes at Target on my “day off”: $20.00

Taking daughter to the park only for her to poop on the slide and call me stupid: 1 hour of precious “day off” time wasted on ungrateful devil baby.

Working a full day yesterday and letting grandparents deal with her instead: Priceless

I’m starting a weekly ritual: Priceless Thursdays

Time will tell if I can actually pull it off, but here’s the first one.

New tires for car: $500

New rear windshield wiper: $10

Not smashing car through neighbor’s bushes when car careens backward out of snowbank:  Priceless.