I’m not dead yet! I swear you guys!
I’ve been very busy doing some very BIG things!
I don’t work at the library anymore. I quit.
I quit because I GOT A FANCY LADY JOB!!!!!
Yes! I did!
It’s my second week as a real, full time fancy copywriter and social media maven at a web development, PR, advertising and marketing company. I work for my friend Gina who is so much fancier than your friend Gina I can’t even tell you.
Can you believe this shit? It’s dreams coming true here, people. DREAMS COMING TRUE.
And we had to hire a babysitter for Homeslice and guess what?
SHE DOES THE DISHES AND THE LAUNDRY AND OMG SHE DUSTED!
I have a maidlaundressnanny.
I just need a whore and all my dreams will have come true. All of them.
This sure beats the Great Brain Tumor Crisis of Early 2011, I can tell you that much.
So yes. I am a real writer with a real job and stuff now. I kind of miss the library, but it’s more the people than the job. That job was boring as hell. Now I’m really busy all day and I get to wear cute clothes instead of the dingy corduroy pants I bought at Saver’s that I wore to the library. The people at my new job are super nice and everyone is so helpful and its totally okay to say “motherfucker” so obviously I fit right in.
Basically, I’m on cloud nine these days and I have to go now because I need some more fancy lady clothes and I have to buy them online because I’m sooooo busy being Queen.
I love you, Queefies!
OMG and PS: I’m up on the Toy With Me’s talking about my vibrators again:
- Save Moonlight!
- Dance, yo.
- I have nothing for you except some updates and you’re going to love it because I have nothing for you except some updates.
- Ask Girlfriend
- Best Wishes. We’ll Miss You. Go Fuck Yourself.