Lydia, oh Lydia, oh have you met Lydia, Lydia the ta-tooed lady…

Once upon a time, I had a beautiful Greyhound named Tashi.


She was the love of my life, and I still get all teary when I think about her. I was so devastated after she died that I vowed that I could never own another Greyhound again. And then last week I was thinking about her and how she would have been great with Alice and Big Pussy and Homeslice and Girlfriend and so I made a phone call to Greyhound Pets of America and got an appointment to look at some Greyhounds.

It was EASY. They answered the phone on the first ring and said we could come any time to look at the dogs. Nobody ignored me. Nobody treated me like I was inconveniencing them, and nobody was going to stand me up. No more messing around with these Rescue groups. This is a national organization and they don’t mess around.

On Friday, we picked Girlfriend up from school instead of waiting for the bus to arrive, and made the hour long trip on a cold and raw day. The adoption coordinator kept the kennel at her house, and was very sick that day. She kept having to go inside to throw up due to some heavy medication she was on. She could have canceled, and had good reason to, but she was there with a volunteer, dedicated to finding a home for one of her dogs. They stood out in the cold and the damp with us, discussing and choosing the best 5 candidates out of 28 dogs to show us.

We spent time with each and every one of them, and they were all wonderful, but one in particular hit us all in the chest. This one showered Homeslice with kisses and walked nicely with Girlfriend on the leash.


And when I bent down to pet her, she kissed my face and put her head on my shoulder and leaned into me.


It was all over at that point. AFC’s Allison, fresh off a track in Pensacola Florida was destined to be ours. We went home and started making preparations to bring her home with us the next day. Girlfriend picked out a brush and a fluffy bed.


We even got her a seat belt for the car ride, which, by the way, was pure comedy.



It was exactly like trying to stuff a giraffe into briefcase.

Greyhounds aren’t great at sitting down, and so it took massive effort to get her to sit in our front seat. The adoption lady had walked us to the car and was standing there the whole time watching us trying to stuff this mass of gangly legs and claws into our clown car. She had concerns, I could tell, but she still let us take her.

Allison didn’t stay seated for long and preferred to spend her first ever car ride standing up, panting in Mister’s face and stepping on the center console window controls. When she wasn’t doing the windows up and down, she was farting. When she wasn’t doing that, she was trying to wiggle out of her seat belt to come and sit in the backseat with me and Homeslice and Girlfriend. She was all legs and claws and drool and farts for the entire ride and we had to pull over to re-situate her. And of course there was traffic. And of course, Homeslice thought it might add to the occasion by screaming her head off for 40 out of the 60 minutes. And Girlfriend kept asking the kind of ludicrous questions only a five-year-old can come up with.

We finally got her home and introduced her to Alice, which went well, but as soon as we got into the house and she encountered the hard wood floor, she was exactly like Bambi on ice. Her legs splayed out all over because she’s never been inside a people house before. Shiny, slippery wood is not a surface she’s ever walked on.

She’s still struggling with that three days later, but she’s getting better. She kind of skates from carpet to carpet. We still have to carry her up and down the stairs because she’s never seen those before either. She’s desperately thin with chunks of fur missing and lots of scabs and scrapes just starting to heal from track life. There’s fur missing from around her eyes and behind her ears from where the muzzle rubbed it away, and she’s kind of depressed. This is like a re-birth for her and she needs time to adjust. She hasn’t had one accident in the house and is really good at holding her pees and poops.

We feel privileged to have the opportunity to help her learn how to be a spoiled and beloved pet instead of a money making slave. She is a sweet and gentle soul and we are already madly in love. She’s standing next to me right now with her head in my lap. How cool is that?

Alice likes her, too.


And Big Pussy doesn’t give a crap one way or the other.

The only problem we have is that her name is Allison and every time we call her, Alice comes running, but we’re still calling Allison and poor Alice is like “I’m here! Why are you screwing with me!?! WHAT IS HAPPENING???”

So, we need a new name and you, marvelous Queefies, get to help us. You can vote for up to two names or leave us a suggestion if you think we suck with our old lady names.

Allison's new name should be...

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  1. Crissy. I’m dying here. I need for you to send me an email with a picture of the new puppy because stupid work won’t let me see flickr photos. I’m DYING.

    My sister has a rescued greyhound too! And he Bambis on her hard wood floors all the time, but now he thinks it’s fun!

    I’m SOOOOO happy for you!
    .-= k8’s last blog post… Weekend A Wash =-.

  2. I would name her Bambi for sliding all over the floor. That was a nice thing you did by taking her. I once got a dog with a spot on it’s side. It cost a lot of money having it tested for ring worm. It turned out just to be a bite from another dog. Make sure your dog is healthy.
    .-= Connie’s last blog post… Trunk or Treat fail =-.

  3. I completely love greyhounds, and always thought that if I got one I would name it “Molasses” (Molly for short). ‘Cuz, they’re fast, y’know, and the juxtaposition…it sounds a lot funnier in my head.
    .-= Cobwebs’s last blog post… Spooky Scarves =-.

  4. She’s elegant. Love how welcoming Alice is to her. Very sweet.

    The names all work but with her being all farty on the drive home, what about “Wendy”?

  5. Retired greyhounds are the best pets. I am tearing up just thinking about my old guy Lucky. He was such an easy going old man. I think Fiona fits her pefectly. Best of luck.

  6. Congrats on the new addition! She’s pretty! That’s so awesome she’s going to have a great life as a pet now. I tried to vote but it wouldn’t work…I totally think she looks like a Fiona!

  7. Vivian is lovely. She sounds like she has the great greyhound personality going on.

    The farts should stop with a change of diet. (Rescues don’t always get the highest quality food donations.) Or that could be her way of showing excitement. Hope not!

    On a more serious note, don’t forget to VOTE in that other election thingy, everybody!

  8. She totally looks like a Fiona. And you hit me in the heart with this one, lady friend- I have such a soft spot for greyhounds. The stories I’ve heard from shelters I’ve volunteered at… they’ll break you. I’m so glad you did this.
    .-= LiLu’s last blog post… Zombies are the New Vampires =-.

  9. Congrats on the new member of your family! Have to ask though – how attached is she to her name? Was it her actual name or one the adoption people gave her. Because a new name might take a while for her to get used to.

    If you’re looking for something similar you could try Ally or Abby.
    .-= Jenine’s last blog post… Our Halloween =-.

  10. She is a beauty, and it is great of you to give her a loving home, where she’ll be loved spoiled and running you ragged. I voted for Fiona as she looks like a Fiona.

  11. Awww, she’s beautiful!! I’m so glad you finally found the right dog! I was reading all your other posts totally feeling your frustration. I voted Vivian, because it sounds like Allison, so it would be easy for her to get used to, and because I looove that name. If I’d had a girl her name would’ve been Vivian! Congrats, and can’t wait to see all the pictures of her transition to spoiled, beloved pet!

  12. The first time I ever saw a greyhound in person was when I by chance found myself in the middle of a meet and greet event with a local rescue group in a busy shopping district. I stopped to pet one of the dogs, crouching down to be at eye level with him. He rested his head on my shoulder and that’s when I died a little. I vowed to adopt one as soon as I had my own home… and I’m so glad I did!

  13. Congratulations!! What a sweet girl…

    I fucking hate that there is such a thing as dog racing, but glad that you have a new member of your family.

  14. I’m de-lurking finally.

    Congratulations on your new sweetie! The photos of the residual effects of Allison’s life as a track dog brought tears to my eyes – which were outweighed only by the tears of happiness that she will spend the rest of her life being loved and coddled. Well done! You’ve righted a wrong in the universe.

  15. Thank you, thank you, thank you for adopting a greyhound. You did an awesome, amazing thing and I could just hug every single one of you. I used to share an office with a rescued greyhound. He was the sweetest, most gentle dog I have ever met. He didn’t grow out of the farting, but he did learn how to climb stairs.
    .-= Heidi Renée’s last blog post… On the mend =-.

  16. Okay, I am up early and tearing up at my kitchen table, thanks to you. We just lost our dog last month and I cannot bear to think of replacing a gem who was one of a kind. But you got me smiling and crying and thinking and when we are ready I will think of Allison or whatever you name this beauty! Which brings me to the name game. I voted for Vivian, one of my favorite names but I will throw you my two all-time old lady names. Phyllis, my late grandmother’s name is the best and would have been my son’s name if I had been permitted and Esther, a random but big favorite. Good luck and I loved this post. Makes me miss my puppy…
    .-= Dotty’s last blog post… Its My Family and Ill Stop If I Want To =-.

  17. Thank you so much everyone! Greyhounds are truly wonderful dogs and I wish everyone could have one! She is doing very well and is coming out of her shell and even playing with toys!

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