Everyone always thought Funshine Bear was a little bit g-a-y

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but we didn’t know about the bondage until just recently.

I don’t know what it is with me and the gays lately. I think I’m still waiting for my gay bff to come walking into my life. Maybe I’m trying to attract attention.

Or maybe I just want a new best friend.

Like, maybe this one:

Her name is Wanda and our application to adopt her has been approved! Sadly, the rescue group is horribly, horribly, slow in answering questions and responding to emails, so I still don’t know anything about her. It takes them a week to reply to an email. 7 days! I thought they wanted to find homes for these dogs. I had to email them to find out she was actually pending adoption for US! I’m confused. This thing has been in the works for almost three weeks and I still have no clue what’s up with this dog and I’m frustrated because I hate not knowing and just hanging like this. I don’t know whether to shit or go collar shopping.

And then I found this one who is the sweetest thing, but a little smaller than I wanted:

I might apply to adopt her, but if Wanda works out, I don’t want to put something in the works with Minnie and then back out of it. That seems mean.

And just so people know, I am NOT replacing Alice. Why would I ever do that? I adore her. She’s the only one in this house who doesn’t give me any shit. She’s a friend who never disappoints me and she is always glad to see me. Overjoyed, actually. I want more of that. More joy. More love. More best friends. More dog bodies splayed out on my kitchen floor when I’m cooking.

My mother will shit her pants and then die three times when she finds this out and so I haven’t told her, and if any one of you spills the beans, so help me Jeebus I will totally ban you from this blog.

I don’t know how to do that, but I will figure it out and then you’re screwed, buddy.

Of course, she can just come right over here and read about it on her own, which is actually pretty likely and so mom, if you’re reading this please, please, please, don’t shit on this. It’s the happiest and most excited I’ve been in a long, long, time. And it’s your fault for raising a crazy dog lady.

The end.

PS: Toy with Me today! I forgot what it’s about…oh wait…I remember now: Girl on Girl Action Isn’t For Me. WHAT IS WITH ME WITH THE GAY???

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19 comments

  1. I always find it funny that they make you fill out a huge ass long application to get a pet (and make you wait forever) but any jackass can pop out a kid. Hmmmmmm…….

  2. Right? I had to promise to love the dog forever and provide phone numbers of people who would take the dog if I die!!!! Nobody asked me a thing before I took my babies home from the hospital.

    Yes, Rainbow Bear is the gayest of the bears, but you can’t have a rainbow without funshine, right?

  3. um, not to get my geek on or anything, but the Rainbow Care Bear is technically Cheer Bear…which only confirms his G-A-Y status. Not that there’s anything wrong with that! 🙂

    “And it’s your fault for raising a crazy dog lady.” HAHAHAHA!

    I won’t spill the beans…no matter how nuts it is that you want another animal/eater/pooper in your home!

  4. Wanda is very, very cute. VERY CUTE. These dog rescue people are nuts. Seriously. I’ve heard horror stories of dealing with them. You’d think they were curing the common cold. But no, they’re helping people who want dogs find dogs that need homes. Shouldn’t be such an ordeal.
    .-= Melissa Lion’s last blog post… My Fear of Shower Caddies =-.

  5. Wanda! Oh how I love her! Look at her face! I’m seriously thinking about getting a dog. I don’t go look because I know I won’t be able to look away. The Second Chance rescue people were at the AIDS walk last weekend and they had Lhasa Apso puppies. NOOOOOOOO!
    .-= k8’s last blog post… Eggs and The Gay =-.

  6. I just spent about 10 minutes looking at all the cute dogs up for adoption. It makes me want another dog … and is exactly why I cannot visit our local adoption agencies … because I will bring home another one. Too bad you can’t go visit them to follow-up on all your questions … that’d be so much easier, dontcha think?!
    .-= Nilsa @ SoMi Speaks’s last blog post… Planning =-.

  7. See, the internets is bad for pet lovers. My brother in Philly fell in love with a dog in Cali. Then had to figure out how to get it to him. But the deal fell through, which is probably for the best. I hope this works out for you one way or the other. I would limit yourself to two unless you have them outside more than I do. We have 3, as you know, and that can get a bit nuts at times. Best of luck!

  8. I posted photos today of the Beagle Brigade. Go get your fix while you hurry up and wait on the slow mo adoption.. Once Wanda is in your arms and no longer with the pet hoarders, let’s set up a play date. Your west coast bestie BFForevha.
    .-= Kathleen’s last blog post… Wordless Wednesday – The Beagles =-.

  9. Hey, hey, heeeeey now. I’m a dog rescuer and I am not a nut! Neither is Marissa, she’s buried under about 200 emails/day, probably more. I do make people fill out a 3 page application for my dogs, I check every reference, ask trick questions, and learn your deepest, darkest secrets from your vet. Because when I pull a dog out of Animal Control I make a commitment and take on a responsibility to make sure this animal never lands in the system again where it will surely die, most likely by gassing. Yes, gassing. Because the majority of the country does not euthanize by injection. I won’t even tell you about the shooting dogs out back, running over with trucks and drowning. I will always take back any dog I have adopted out no questions asked but I will never knowingly allow any one of my dogs to ever end up in Animal Control, dying alone & cold on a concrete floor, in a black box gas chamber or by a strangers needle.

  10. BatCaveTwidget- I know they’re swamped, and after all this is over, I might volunteer to help screen applications or something for them. I’m not sure how I could help, but they sure need it. From the perspective of the person wanting to adopt, this sucks. Three weeks of waiting just to have a few questions answered is a long time, especially since we’re supposedly adopting this dog and I still don’t know if she’s right for our family. Meanwhile, a dog that really, truly is right for us, a dog I have all the information I need on, is waiting in a kennel for someone to foster or adopt her and I can’t move on it because I’m still waiting to hear about the other one. It’s really frustrating from this perspective. I don’t mind the application, I actually enjoyed filling it out, and I don’t mind providing references and the home inspection. I want these things to happen so they can be sure they’re putting the dog in the right place. A mismatch is the last thing I want. I just want to adopt a homeless doggie and make it one less victim of horrible things like you mentioned. I just wish it was less stressful.

  11. I gotta go w/ Mik here. I’ll never understand why it takes these groups so long to get back to people. If somebody even glances at one of my dogs I’m like “Here! Fill out and application now! NOW! DO IT RIGHT NOW! DO IT WHILE I’M AT YOUR HOUSE DOING THE HOME VISIT! LET’S GO NOW! RIGHT NOW!”. Yes, that’s what I’m like. Because I’m so damn excited that somebody wants one of my dogs, I will leave work and risk ridicule to get my dog a home.
    PS – I have two up for adoption right no.w. Completely trained, housebroken, vetted and HW negative.

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