So we bought this swingset for Homeslice and Girlfriend, right?
And it took us a long time to find just the right one for just the right price with just the right quality and we were very excited to show the picture to Girlfriend and what does she say, Queefies?
“It doesn’t have a lot of stuff to do.”
Um, excuse me?
There’s a playhouse with a fucking veranda, three swings, a rock wall, a picnic table, a sandbox, and a slide. It’s nicer than our house, really.
Maybe Mister and I will live out there instead because apparently, she wants Disney out in the yard and anything less is unacceptable.
Clearly, Girlfriend is spoiled to death, so to toughen her up a bit, we’re not going to put mulch under the swingset/palace. We’re gonna put rocks like we had when we were kids. My swingset was made of metal and it had a couple of swings and some monkey bars and a trapeze and that was it. It was not made out of some nice non-splintery cedar with rounded edges. There was no playhouse, picnic table, veranda, etc., and if we went too high on the swings, the back would come out of the ground and we spent entire afternoons trying to get the whole thing to flip over. I think my brother actually did once. I can’t remember. And instead of this “playground grade mulch” we had rocks to land on and if you fell off the monkey bars because you were clowning around like a dumbass, you got fucking hurt and it was your own fault for being stupid and you learned not to be a dumbass anymore.
Kids today are soft.
And so we spent half a billionty monies on a swingset that we want more than Girlfriend does. Homeslice is pretty excited about it, but she’s only just recently discovered how much fun a ball is, so you know. She’s easily impressed at this point.
Come find out why I’m wearing these ridiculous socks! Surra de Bunda–Punched by an Ass