As you know I’ve been eBaying a little bit for the cherubs and I got to thinking.
“Crissy, you should see if there’s something for YOU on eBay!” And then I was all ” Like, OMG! You’re so smart!”
I’m always shopping for Homeslice and Girlfriend and never for myself. Their stuff is just so cute and shopping for myself is really frustrating because of that whole being stuck in that gray area between 17 and 71 and also I have no money so it’s just more fun to make them look cute. If I could, I would be an Anthropologie girl. God, I love that stuff.
(note to Queefies: My birthday is coming up. You guys should chip and get me a gift card to Anthropologie. I think about $20,000 should do it.)
So I’ve been Anthropologieing on eBay. I got a totally awesome skirt the other day and I’d show you but I can’t get the fucking picture. Trust me it’s gorgeous and I’m thrilled with it.
But can I ask you something?
What is wrong with people?
In my search for fabulousness, I came across a whole lot of dysfunction. Below are just a few of the pictures I found in my search for “Anthropologie Dress.”
I haave the longest arms EEEVERRRR!
Say that in Oprah’s voice because that’s how I hear it in my head when I say it. I’m so distracted by the arms I can’t remember what the dress looks like. Seriously, I have to keep going back to look and I get distracted every time. Also the flip-flops are annoying.
And please, don’t get your tired friend to model the most unflattering dress ever made.
She’s not helping you sell that shit. And is it me or is it skeevie to see people wearing the stuff? I don’t want your pits on my potential new dress, k?
Um, speaking of skeevie…
This dress is on the floor laying on top of an ugly old sleeping bag next to some shoe polish, some dude’s boots, a pizza box, and a bottle cap. It has zero bids.
Shocking.
Rotate the fucking picture, ASSHAT!
You managed to take the picture, create an eBay account and upload the picture, but you couldn’t figure out how to rotate it? And put your foot down. You don’t look kicky and cute. You’re a moron.
And who stands like this?
WHO? I think the poor girl has broken her back! What would Tyra say?
So yes. Fucking people.
PS: Toy with Me today! It’s up… Men And Sex Toys – Double Standard?
PSS: Don’t forget my contest to win a $25 gift card!
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that last one almost looks like she’s facing the opposite direction!
I just like to think of the models as dead people. That makes you want to but it, right? Zombies.
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Yeah. Totally, k8. The walking dead are a whole different story!
You would think that they would take better quality photos of things that they want to sell. Looks like they took the pictures for a cheap phone. You are right, the arms are really long.
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Oh my. No seriously, oh my. You have just contributed to my fear of the eBay machine.
Are you sure you weren’t on Craigslist? Because that’s some serious Craigslist action right there. NOT THAT I WOULD KNOW.
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HAH
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omg the mister is right, that last one looks she has one of those heads that spin around and it’s facing the back.
i had no idea this kind of entertainment could be found on ebay.
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your toywithme post is up!
I think the last one is wearing her arms backwards. She is totally discombobulated.
toywithme’s last blog post… Men And Sex Toys – Double Standard?
Wow. Just Wow.
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……Don’t those people shop around to at least try and figure out how others are presenting the dress? Like stealing a photo from the actual store website?!
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God I love Anthropologie. LOVE. Like creepy stalker love. I’ve never tried ebay for it though – doesn’t look promising. But I do check their sales items on an almost daily basis.
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Ew, wearing the dress in the ad is always wrong, Just wrong. Especially when you wear it backwards.
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Another Ebay rule is, if a listing calls something “gorgeous” or “stunning” what it actually means is,” this item is so supremely hideous, it’s possible it will make babies cry”.
Sigh. I love Anthropologie. Now I might cry.
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My favorites are the ones of the naked people taking pictures of shiny objects. Pretty funny actually.
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