YES! YES! YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Ohgodohgodohgodohgoooooddddd.

I’m up at Toy with Me today! Talking about Porn. It’s surprisingly safe for work (mainly). There’s no pictures at least. Well, not dirty ones… They’re not really dirty at least. Like if your boss came over and looked over your shoulder she wouldn’t like, immediately fire you. She’d have to read some of it first and then she’d fire you. PS: Listen, don’t get all kerfuffly if the post isn’t up yet. We get up wicked early and besides. The Toy With Mes are in like, Canada, and it’s different there so blame Canada for being tardy. Those Tardy Canadians. PSS: I Want Porn For Chicks at TOYWITHME

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27 comments

  1. Ben, you’re only late because you’re too busy dancing in a Snuggie or saying things like “aboot” in that cute Canadian way.

    Stoogie, I think we should discuss cheesy pick-up lines. Like, I had a guy tell me he would fuck me so good I’d forget all about my boyfriend. This was followed later in the evening by him asking me again if I’d be going home with him (I politely declined). He then asked what my name was again-he was too drunk to remember. It was at THAT moment that I decided I should go home with him – clearly a winner.

    (no, I didn’t really go home with him)

  2. Pimp, Crissy asked you out? Right on. How many men can say a hottie like her asked them out? I bet not many. Did she just straight up ask you out? I love her confidence!!

    Stoogie, I love that line. It’s one I haven’t heard before. Guess I’ve been under a rock.

  3. Stoogepie said “Yay, it’s up” (That’s What She Said!)

    I went and read it and left a comment with a sad revelation about my past love life. I love it when Crissy is fun AND educational!
    .-= MsDarkstar’s last blog post… Re-Prioritizing =-.

  4. daisee: indeed she did. on the way out of class one day, she said, “how’d you like to go out some time?”

    it took me a moment to realize what was happening, and then i said, SURE.

    she couldn’t keep her hands off me the entire first date. 😉 of course we were pretty high on multiple substances while drinking our asses off in a ridiculously loud, packed club buried in a casino…

    ahh, the good old days.

  5. Yeah. It’s a tale as old as time, really. Girl meets boy in Milton class. Boy totally ignores girl except for the one time when he defended a paper she presented. Girl asks boy out, boy is clueless but accepts the date invite. Boy pick girl up at her house, is grilled mercilessly by girl’s mother and then girl and boy drive to casino in CT and get absolutely trashed on amphetamines, pot, and booze and they live happily ever after. The end.

  6. And for the record, I couldn’t stand up because of all the drugs we took and so I had to lean on SOMETHING.

    I’m not that kind of a girl, Pimp. You know that.

  7. Ken – You totally could have killed those two hours watching porn or better yet making porn 😉

    Crissy – That is the most beautiful, romantic, *sniff sniff* touching (pass a kleenex please) story I have every heard.

    Ben – You’re G-D damn right us Canadians are polite! And for the record I was very busy politely telling me kid to get her sweet ass off to school because she was driving me crazy lying around the house being all sick and everything.
    .-= toywithme’s last blog post… I Want Porn For Chicks =-.

  8. Pimp and Crissy, that is the sweetest story ever. Might need to edit some when you tell the grandkids. But still, so sweet.

    And Pimp, that was uber-sweetness with the whole “richest man in the world” comment. Sounds like someone’s buttering up for something.

    And Crissy? I don’t remember right now if you are an Edward fan, but I realized last night he’s pimping some sort of new car on the tee-vee. Perhaps whatever Pimp is in trouble for could be remedied with said car.

  9. Daisee, this is exactly why I love you. I saw the same commercial and Edward is indeed driving MY Volvo. Pimp’s not in trouble but he would like to get laid and I’m thinking that Edward’s Volvo is very inspirational if you know what I mean.

  10. Crissy, I agree with you completely, most porn is quite boring. That’s why I recommend The Unbearable Lightness of Being, a film from, oh the late 80s or early 90s. It’s positively dripping with sex, but there’s a story, there’s Daniel Day Lewis, and you get to listen to music by Leos Janacek, a great composer (it’s a film about the Russian invasion of Prague in the 60s). Really, every other scene is sexytime, but it’s not drawn out, graphic sexytime, it’s sexytime with a lot left to the imagination.

    Of course, there’s also Tu Mama Tambien, for lots of sexytime here and there, with everyone.

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