You know what Crissy’s boss showed her last night and now Crissy is dying to try it?
It looks pretty awesome if you ask Crissy and if you didn’t ask her you’ve been meaning to. Crissy feels sort of guilty (Crissy feels sort of guilty about lots of things, like being so much better than everyone it’s part of her gift) that she doesn’t use her Wii Fit, but that’s mostly because it’s stupid.
What is all the fuckery with unlocking workouts? If Crissy is going to do a workout, she’s going all in, full out, tits to the wall and she doesn’t have time for unlocking shit, you know? Wii Fit just frustrates Crissy and Crissy is full up with things that frustrate her, thank you. Crissy is in a constant state of frustration and chaos and if you could hear inside of Crissy’s head it would sound EXACTLY like this:
And maybe even worse than that, probably. That was kind of lame.
So her blog is a fucking nightmare. It used to be pretty much the best thing since like, anything awesome, but now? Meh.
Crissy knows, Queefies.
Babies are a lot of work.
But Crissy is excited about this new Wii thing because it looks like it will maybe even be fun because it has Jenny McCarthy in it and Crissy likes her. Crissy is a little worried about this body scanning thing though because she feels like her Wii Fit judges her. Like when Crissy would miss a workout, it noticed and gave her a rash of shit about it. Crissy is hard enough on herself, Wii. That’s also one of her gifts, so she doesn’t need you to tell her she missed a workout. She knows already so don’t make Crissy unplug you and feed you to her Liger:
Just kidding. Big Pussy isn’t really a Liger. But he wants to be and that’s the point Crissy is trying to make.
So when the Wii Your Shape thing scans Crissy’s body, will it say mean stuff to her about her assical area and Oh! My god do you think it will notice her low knee situation?
There’s only one way to find out if the Wii Your Shape thing is stupid or not, Queefies.
Somebody needs to send Crissy one.
- I got a new plant yesterday. Someone was just giving them away and I took it because I love getting new plants. It’s sort of like getting a new pet, except they don’t piss on the floor.
- Jillian Michaels is a sweaty whore
- Prince Derek makes Crissy want to do Very Naughty Things. This cannot be normal.
- Oh Chia Tree, Oh Chia Tree, Na, Na, Na, Hmm, Hmm, Hmm, Hmm…
- Abby Normal Puts Her Sneakers On