They’re two, they’re four, they’re six, they’re eight, shunting trucks and hauling freight…

So yes.


Over the weekend The Crissys and The Micheles took all the little childrens to see Thomas the Tank Engine!

Crissy was going to wear her Lady Gaga outfit but at the last minute realized that maybe Thomas isn’t into black vinyl and so she went with something a little more understated with just a hint of bondage from the baby sling.  Crissy also climbed all over the other trains just to make Thomas jealous.  It drove him wild. Crissy could tell.


Before anyone goes thinking Crissy is one of those sad monkeys who carries around a dead baby, just know that Homeslice is bored. She’s not dead.

And aside from the train climbing, Crissy did not ride any of the other rides because Crissy doesn’t do rides as you Queefies may or may not recall from the Storyland Turtle Ride Incident of 2008:


And that was fine because she had Homeslice in the baby sling thing anyway and also she kept Michele company because she no likey the rides neither.


Girlfriend.  Also not a big fan of death from 8,000 feet in the air.

Here are Crissy and Michele waiting for everyone to get off the Ferris wheel  of death.


Don’t they look HOT?  Crissy and Michele were the only two MILFS at the whole place and Crissy was disappointed at the number of DILFS around.  As in, there weren’t any.

Not a one!

Instead, Crissy saw this dipshit:


Matching shirts?

And this guy is pretty badass in his ninja socks:


Very nice.  Great success.

And then the Victim of an Unfortunate Incident.


Nomnomnomnomnomnom….You’d think he would have learned that walking while focusing on doing other things leads to accidents and neck injuries, but no.

And Crissy wanted very muchly to touch Thomas but she couldn’t because there was a guy standing there guarding him!

Can you believe that?

Thomas has a bodyguard.

So when  Crissy tried to climb up on him, the bodyguard guy told her to get down because there was not to be any inappropriate touching of Thomas and then, AND THEN! he threatened to have a restraining order put on poor, poor Crissy.

It was humiliating.

But Girlfriend and Alena got to have their picture taken next to him and so that was good.


And Girlfriend did not lose it when confronted with Jesus/Thomas and so that was a big relief to Crissy because she didn’t want a scene and she knows this is sort of heart breaking to the Queefs because they were all looking forward to seeing a video of Crissy suffering but it didn’t happen and so HA!

You guys are mean for wishing such things on poor, dear Crissy.

All in all it was a pretty wonderful day and everyone had a nice time except for Homeslice who was unimpressed with the whole thing and would  much rather have kicked it in her crib with a boob and a nap.


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  1. I never knew ninja socks looked like ballet slippers…and I LOVE LOVE LOVE the AC/DC tee-shirt with tutu.

    Does it come in my size? I have never looked as cool.

  2. I’m glad the Crissys and the Micheles all had a nice and lovely time. No breakdowns is a major accomplishment, so I hope you all rewarded yourselves appropriately 🙂

    And those ninja socks? They are apparently the new rage that will replace the crocs. I saw them first with runners who liked them (for various reasons). Now I understand they are everywhere. Yeesh.

  3. hey you mother f’er

    my post was first

    just because you can change my times you damn admin

    p.s. REAL men do not wear these silly things

  4. I’m with Homeslice, give me a boob and a nap anyday. Except for football. Then give me a boob and the remote and it is winner winner!

  5. I DESPISE ferris wheels. I love Girlfriend for hating it. And I also love her tutu and AC DC shirt. That rocks hard CORE.

    And I think that in last picture of Homeslice? She looks a bit like Pimp. No?
    .-= k8’s last blog post… Yes. Yes, I Did. =-.

  6. Crissy you look fantastic! Love the picture of Girlfriend on the ferris wheel. I have never seen a more terrified look. Last picture of Homeslice looks like she is thinking WTF are these people out of their minds bringing me to this place. K8 is right Homeslice looks like the Mister. Adorable! Also-those shoes are seriously ridculous.

  7. I’m pretty sure all the MILFs out there dress up their husbands and do mean things to their husbands resulting in injury just to make sure they will never be classified as DILFs. No seriously. Wait until we have kids. And then compare the before and after photos of Sweets. It won’t be pretty.

  8. Hey, Crissy, I love your blog…even though my offspring are WAY past the age of yours (as in 22 and almost 24 years old). I try to emulate you, adapting it to my current child-free state. I remember well what it was like with two small people ( and a big dic*) depending on me!

  9. I think we could all kick it in our crib with a boob and a nap”, it would make weekdays so much more fun 😉 Gorgeous photos… I just discovered your blog, BTW.

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