Anyone who gets that reference wins absolutely nothing.
So you guys remember these people, right?
And there’s a general rule at Crissy’s house that if it’s loud or it smells bad, it’s probably coming from our own little slice of West Virginia. They’re always shouting, they’re always burning something, they power wash dirtbikes at 8pm every night, and they’re always fixing some old engine that backfires and scares the bejeezus out of Crissy and they’re clearly pretty annoying but the Crissy’s have come to embrace it as free entertainment because they’re not going anywhere even though they were almost foreclosed on a few months ago and Crissy cried bitter tears of sadness was glad for it because no one deserves to lose their home. They’re nice people, really. They bring gifts for Girlfriend and Homeslice which is so sweet of them and they’re always very kind and jovial when Crissy talks to them mostly because they’re always drunk but that’s sort of enviable if you ask Crissy.
It’s just that they should live in a barn instead of next door to Crissy.
But like she just said, she’s going to embrace it because of stuff like she saw the other day. The woman who lives there, we’ll start calling her Maudette, was standing on the roof of her RV (don’t get Crissy started on how nice she thinks it looks in the driveway) with a beer in one hand and a ciggie hanging out of her mouth and Crissy had one hand stirring her pot of dinner and the other on the video camera because seriously? That’s a recipe for hilarity if Crissy ever saw one but sadly, she did not fall or do anything funnier than stumble around up there and Crissy never figured out what she was trying to do but it was still nice because Crissy got to laugh and enjoy the show whilst cooking and that is worth the pain in the ass of living next to Maudette, her husband Earl, and all their construction workerish friends.
And so now Crissy is thrilled to death because guess what you guys?
They got a trampoline.
This is gonna be soooo good. As soon as the rain stops, Crissy is sure Maudette will get her Bud on and get out there to do some jumpin’ and when she does, Crissy will be ready.
- This is way better than the nematodes, you guys. Like, WAY.
- What is Rachel Ray smoking?
- A rabbit in the cage is worth two in the bush. Hahahahaha! Crissy said “bush.”
- This Ain’t From Tiffany’s!!!