When your birthday falls on a Friday you can declare it your Birthday Weekend and nobody can say shit to you until Monday.
It’s true, Queefs.
You can start saying shit to Crissy now.
It is no longer her birthday.
Boo.
Crissy and Mister and Michele and Richard went out on Friday night to this establishment with cloth napkins and NO KID’S MENU. It was also Michele and Rich’s wedding anniversary but whatever because this post is about Crissy’s birthday and not those guys and she just wishes they’d stop making her birthday all about them but clearly Crissy’s birthday is a day when magical things happen like people getting married and queens being born and stuff.
And Crissy had the Salmon Oscar which was very nice and the other people all had something too but Crissy doesn’t remember what because LOOK!
A MARTINI!!!
Crissy hasn’t had one of those bad boys in like, well, forever and so it was pretty glorious. There was also wine involved if you must know and Crissy was a little bit nervous about all the alcohols but it turns out that she was not Party Asshole. In fact, nobody was Party Asshole and that makes Crissy a little bit sad because that leaves her with very little to report to the Queefs who she knows have been waiting all weekend to find out about how the royal festivities went and so Crissy will just show the Queefs a picture of The Royal Bosom instead and hope that is exciting enough:
Crissy does not know why Mister chose to make the picture black and white because it looks stupid like that do you hear Crissy Mister? but she told you Queefs that her birthday dress would show off her boobies in a very spectacular way and it totally did.
Everyone was commenting and by everyone Crissy means everyone.
Even Crissy’s mother-in-law wanted to fluff them and maybe even do a little motorboating.
True story.
And then on Saturday Crissy’s mom made her a lovely breakfast and a nice cake:
And it was so delicious that Crissy ate half of it that very day and then some for breakfast yesterday and some more for lunch.
Crissy does not know why her baby weight isn’t just falling off of her.
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don’t worry Crissy, with that stunning cleavage no one will be looking anywhere else!
When I’m 35, I really hope my tits look like that too.
Specifically after children’s
And if they don’t? I elect to get them stapled back to their glory.
deutlich’s last blog post… This is Goodbye
hey, here’s another one:
a most frustrating irony in my life is the fact that those VERY LOVELY boobies are TOTALLY OFF LIMITS for funtime.
Crissy’s Pimp’s last blog post… sunday, june 28
Those girls are quite impressive
The Peach Tart’s last blog post… Could Mama Be Responsible That I Love Penis?
Poor Mister… not even pumping fun on a night out?
My birthday was on a Friday last year, and yes. Birthday WEEKENDS are the best! I love your boobies. And I’m glad you had fun.
k8’s last blog post… I Finally Got My Beach Day!
Please spill your secrets for looking so fabulous and how you look like you’re 25 at 35. K? Thanks!
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Well I’m glad you finally took the girls out to celebrate!!
stealthnerd’s last blog post… Finally, someone addressed that whole “the Miss Bliss years were based in Indiana” issue
It looks like you had wonderful festivities and yeah… the royal bosom is hawt!
And you should totally have birthday cake for breakfast. Once you cut it, all the calories fall out!
MsDarkstar’s last blog post… Emo Kitty Poetry comes to my blog…
This post needs more pictures.
Boobies and cake. My three favorite desserts!
I looked for almost half an hour and could not find the martini, but oddly enough my hand is now sore?
PURRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
Also – I have a dress that is ALMOST IDENTICAL but black. TWINS! BOOBIE TWINS!
MeaganKate’s last blog post… my thoughts on the topic …
I’m so glad pregnancy & birth offer some benefits(read: boobs). I’ve always loved mine, they’ve been good to me, but I’m SUPER excited about them being even more spectacular than usual.
Your boobs are HOT!
Also, what kind of lens does Mister use? I love the shots that have a very shallow depth of field.
Dolce’s last blog post… Rug burn in a not so common place
We call those Nummies around my house.
NUMMMMMMIES.
Melissa Lion’s last blog post… Pretty Pretty!
Glad you had a nice night out.
How many times has Mister motorboated those bodacious tatas?
Akilah Sakai’s last blog post… What Would You Do?
dolce:
the three titty pictures were taken with a tamron 17-50mm f/2.8 zoom lens.
the birthday cake pic was taken with a 50 year old nikkor auto-sc 50mm f/1.4 prime lens that is on loan from my father.
melissa: they are SO NUMMY.
akilah: i can’t even breathe on them with all the letting down and engorgement and soreness and assorted bullshit.
lucy is quite a cockblocker.
Wait, you had a martini? I’m sorry. I must have missed that. BECAUSE ALL I SEE IS BOOBS IN THAT PICTURE. Work it, girl!
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I want cleavage. I’ve never had it. Maybe I should try that taping thing.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY AGAIN. You look beeeyootiful.
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Bewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwbbbbbbbbbbbbbsssssssssss!
Brbbrbrbrbrbbrrbbbbbbbbbbbbbbrbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbb (motorboating)…
Definitely the best part of being pregnant and going through the post-partum BS…
Oh, and Mister, the cockblocking won’t last forever. Take that from someone who was pregnant again within a year of having twins. Yes, twins.
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Oh, and I love that dress…where’dya get it? I WANT ONE.
Zan’s last blog post… TMI Thursday: I’m a Little Ashamed of This, But Not More Than HE Should Be
You’re awesome.
*heading to Kohl’s website*
Zan’s last blog post… TMI Thursday: I’m a Little Ashamed of This, But Not More Than HE Should Be
I’m going to CRY. They don’t have my size. But I’ve found about 10 others I like!
Zan’s last blog post… TMI Thursday: I’m a Little Ashamed of This, But Not More Than HE Should Be
I can’t remember the last time I ate at a restaurant with cloth napkins. Sigh. But on the positive side, you look ravishing. SO YOUNG!
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BOOBS!
Happy belated birthday from a lurker =D
Where did you get your dress? I want one so my mother in law will also want to do a little motorboating!!
that pic of you with the martini made me very very very happy for you
and now i want one.
alexa – cleveland’s a plum’s last blog post… the one where someone bought me for charity