Skiing Children and Pregnant Lesbian Porn= one hell of a weekend.

Oh Queefs! Crissy is so sorry she abandoned you on Friday without so much as a word about it but she had a chance to get a life and so she took it.

Sorry.

Mister decided to take Crissy and Girlfriend to Maine to go skiing!!!

But don’t worry.

Crissy doesn’t ski but all she had to hear was Indoor Heated Pool and she was so. there. you guys.

Crissy doesn’t do cold and wet but warm and wet?

Whole ‘nuther story.

Take from that what you will you dirty birds.

And Girlfriend has been wanting to ski ever since she tried it on the Wii.

So here she is:

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OMG!!!

With NO HELMET!!!!!!!!!!

AGAIN!!!!!!

Somebody call Child Protective Services!!!!

Just so you Safety Police Queefs know, that thing she’s wearing over her jacket is a harness that Mister had on her so that if she starts to fall he can pull her up to prevent it. Also, she had Mister’s other bff, Mark (Crissy does not have a picture of him but suffice it to say that Mister has great taste in hot bffs and Crissy wouldn’t mind…), who is a Ski Patrol dude and father of 2 childrens and one on the way to help him school Girlfriend in the ways of the mountain.

See?

Well protected Girlfriend on the chair lift:

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Put down the phone.

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Mister has been dreaming of this moment since the day Crissy found out she had a bun in the oven or a skiier on the lift or whatever with Girlfriend. How the fuck do you spell skiier? Is there one i or two?

Fucking spell check motherfucker…

Girlfriend, contemplating the mountain before taking her first run.

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And from all reports from Mister and Mark it turns out that Girlfriend is a born skiier.

And while the boys were out taking all the little children skiing Crissy and Mark’s wife, Jennifer, who is also pregnant sat in the warmth and comfort of their condo eating cake and contemplating a very important issue.

Why don’t you ever see Pregnant Lesbian Porn?

There must be somebody out there that would like to see that.

Or no?

Would it be too confusing to see two chicks make Sexy Time when they so obviously also play for the other team or is that hot?

Crissy wants to know.

We also thought it would be sort of a logistical nightmare to make it look sexy and not awkward as ass because a pregnant woman on her back is a lot like a turtle on its back. All flailing arms and legs and stuff. They’d spend most of the time helping each other into positions but then again that can be edited right out…

And what happens when somebody’s water breaks?

Does it then turn into a squirting video?

Crissy would like the answer to that question as well.

Please fill her in below.

And Crissy’s Word of the Week is:

Snowball: When the giver of oral sex obtains a mouthful, and then proceeds to kiss/share the contents with the recipient of said oral sex.

Crissy cannot think of a good sentence for snowballing at the moment that does not involve George Bush and Anne Coulter and invites the Queefs/students to come up with one themselves and include it below or, preferably, use it at a staff meeting today and report back.

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31 comments

  1. Oh I know there’s pregnant porn and milk fetish and all that stuff but I wonder about pregnant girl on pregnant girl action. 

    Somebody find me some…

  2. hey, maxie is getting commentluv too?!?

    there IS prego-lesbo porn out there.  i looked around for a good example of it a few minutes ago but i ran out of time and there’s a meeting in a couple of minutes.

    i had a wonderful time taking GF out on the slopes.  she looks so happy in those pictures.

  3. Girlfriend looks happy and not in the least bit cold.    I used to ski and then I got old.  Cold does not appeal to me.  Anything associated with cold or sounds cold does not appeal to me.  Thus, I do not think I will be snowballing in the near future.  Or ever.

  4. Girlfriend looks like she is having a blast.  I need to wear one of those harnesses when I go skiing.
     
    Oh, there is plenty of preggy lez luv out there on DVD.  Some of it is good, too.  Like Belladonna’s Fucking Girls Again is all-girl and features a pregnant Belladonna.
     
    There are snowball videos too.  Here is my sentence: Getting hit by a snowball when you aren’t expecting it can be pretty unnerving.
     
    @Pimp: commentluv is incompatible with TinyMCE.  It only works on machines where TinyMCE does not.

  5. Where’s my fucking comment luv????

    also, how do you get the whole, bold italic strikethrough option in your comment boxes? Ive been so jealous of that…

  6. I happen to own pregnant lesbo porn and I like it.

    So there.

    And I wish I could go skiing. But alas, there is no snow here. So no snowballing either. Bastards.

  7. Girlfriend looks SO cute in her ski outfit! Actually, she kinda looks like she’s a pro at this. Did you by chance ski while pregnant with her?

    Regarding the pregnant lesbian porn, apparently the frown on us googling such things at work.

  8. Skiing broke up my first marriage. I swear it. We called the place where we went skiing/ snowboarding “Divorce Mountain” because about an hour in, I told my hubby that I hated him and I would take the bus home. I also called the snowboard instructor a fucking cunt. To her face.

    I’ve not been back.

  9. Okay, Girlfriend is so freakin’ cute!

    The only porn I’m curious about is the donkey show stuff and if they really do have those shows across the border and if they have them in the US ‘cos I don’t have a passport and … I’ll stop.

    Snowball: I was once hit in the face with 3 snowballs. I took it well.  I rock!

  10. there was a pregnant love scene on the L word….it was pretty hot so i’m sure there is porn out there.

    i just told my boss that my husband and i had a snowball fight this weekend and i choked from having so much fun 🙂

  11. Porn is boring me right now because of the Effexor.

    Conversely, watching girls do hair tutorials on YouTube is endlessly fascinating.

    THEY DIDN’T LIST THIS AS A SIDE EFFECT ON THE BOTTLE.

    I am suing somebody.

  12. Pregnant lesbos don’t always play for the other team. I mean, my brother got a lesbo pregnant and it involved a turkey baster. I kid you not. So, that pregnant lesbo porn might be closer to reality than you think…

  13. There are many kinds of porn I enjoy… however, I am gonna say that pregnant porn, lesbo or otherwise, is not on my list of things I want to see.

    I skiied alot as a kid and never needed a helmet.  Skis with snap bindings might have been helpful, though, as I tore up my knee something awful when I was 6 and have not been skiing since.

    Does anyone but me wonder what exactly went on back at the lodge that 2 pregnant women were discussing preggo lesbo porn?

  14. what happened, ms darkstar, is that i entered a conversation and it immediately turned to filth.

    as generally happens…

    on a related note, i actually stumbled on a hitherto completely unknown-to-me word today. of course it is prurient in nature. don’t ask me what it is, though–i am saving it for crissy’s WOTW.

  15. A request for people to consider the ethics of purchasing maternity clothing. Let’s face it, if you’re willing to have a baby on this planet, you’d better ensure the planet is in a good state! So please try and think about, for example, the cloth the items are made with, the human rights of the factories where they’re made and the ethics of the clothes retailer. Oh, and endeavour to pass on, rather than discarding. Thanks!!!!

  16. This is so funny Chrissy, your pictures are so nice, and your ski board looks like there are not used skis. Are they new? They look so cool and fabulous. Regarding the pregnant lesbian porn, do we have those? Frankly, I find myself curious, as I have not seen one from video stores. I tried searching for it in the internet after reading your blog and several sites crop up. I downloaded a copy and it seems like it was fake. Who would want to watch two pregnant lesbians doing sex? I find it sad because they have to do this to earn money.

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