Crissy’s Day

Yo yo! Zup zup? Stoogepie here.

When Crissy asked me to guest blog for her, I knew that the overdose of smack that had inspired the invitation would probably kill her within the hour. But I accepted anyway, because that’s how I play.

And when I accepted, I had no idea what I should write about. And I still don’t, even as I write this thirty seconds before I will post it. See, I realize that I have to tone things down a bit, because I say things in my own blog that would upset the tender sensibilities of Crissy’s broader and altogether more discriminating audience. So, for instance, I decided that I would not write this guest post on any of the following topics:

  • Rimming: Why women’s excuses for not wanting to suck your ass really don’t hold water.
  • The Sexy Side of Emphysema: That throat-hole is not just for breathing.
  • Recipes: What to do with the food that sticks to your hand during anal fisting.
  • Coma Victims: Does she want you or is she just incontinent?
  • Buying your first home: a guide for registered sex offenders.

I’m not saying that Crissy avoids weighty issues such as these, but she is able to deal with them more tactfully than I, owing largely to the fact that she does not draw pictures of every fucking thing that pops into her head. And her writing is much more subtle. Almost all of my blog entries begin with a question. It’s always something like: “Is it just my imagination or are all the chicks in the burn ward easy?” And then I answer that question, complete with drawings and recipes for accelerants.

All that I’m saying is that Crissy is a hard act for me to follow.

But, follow her I must. So, I will follow in her footsteps completely and write about her life. Yes, I am going to tell you what Crissy’s day is like. Today. When she can’t.

Okay, so here goes. Crissy and Ken take Girlfriend to Story Land. Here is what will happen shortly after they arrive.

Later that day, they will go to eat lunch.

Finally, after a long day, even by Story Land standards, they will prepare to leave.

That’s all I have to say about Crissy’s day.

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