Bringing Sexy Back?

It was just too orange-y before.

Right?

I’ve been ready for a change for a while now and I contacted Delicious Design Studio because everyone and their blogger seems to use her services. And she was lovely and her quote was reasonable, and she’s even following me on Twitter now (QOFECrissy, follow me!), but with all the stuff we need for the house I just couldn’t justify spending the money on redecorating because I prefer not freezing my tits off this winter to a pimpin’ blog.

I know. My priorities are fucked.

And so I asked my husband to help me come up with a new theme. I had one I loved and it was very chic and very Studio 54, that’s still chic right? Disco?

I have no idea.

But the fucker wouldn’t work in Explorer. So shit. I couldn’t use it and I went to bed. Mister, however, kept working and this is what happens when you leave a boy in charge of things. You get a theme called DARKSEX.

I think it’s too sexy for a humor blog.

You think I’m funny don’t you?

Don’ t You?

I mean I rarely talk about sex and if I do it’s because we’re not having any so my blog shouldn’t look like porn.

Right?

I don’t know.

I’m thinking a little less “come fuck me” and a little more “everyone can suck it.”

How about something more regal?

I should be wearing a tiara!

Maybe we’ll just change the background picture.

Or the entire thing.

Maybe just a picture of my ass.

I’m fairly certain I already know how the votes are going to line up. Boys vote for sexy, girls vote for tiara, but we need to find a way to amalgamate (whoa Nelly! That’s a mighty big word there little lady!) the two.

I feel like I’ve been in a real funk lately and I’m a little depressed and stressed and anxious and So. Not. Funny.

Maybe a new look will help me get my mojo back.

You could also send me cash…

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46 comments

  1. I’m going to agree with you and veto Ken’s decision. I think you could do eleventy billion times better.

    There has to be a happy medium… Maybe shooting the same picture with you wearing a tiara?

  2. haha, well…. i DO like the colors, a lot. and you are pretty sexy/sassy, so im thinking whatever you settle upon will be a winner.

    keep the colors though. i dig that.

  3. I think that the orange-y was a little more upbeat at least…even if it was orange-y.

    This is what your blog would look like if Ken wrote it…it doesn’t really look like you.

    but purple is always pretty…

  4. hey, in my defense, part of the picture choice was guided by the target dimensions… 1280×500 is not an easy crop!

    the tech department is currently reviewing potential candidates for a replacement.

  5. I liked the orange-y—but then again, I’m sort of weird, and when I get used to something, I freak when it changes. I know…..add that to my list of NEGATIVES…….

    I think pink, boas, tiaras and long satin gloves, with tons of beads and feathers is more you. Y’all get to work on that.

    Your funny isn’t gone……..not at all.

  6. oh wait….I forgot stuff……….

    Like this one sort of is a Dominatrix theme……

    And your Mister sounds like Mr. Perfectly with late night marathons to perfect something. How can that trait be so cool and so annoying at the same time? Huh?

  7. The orange was upbeat, fun and easily viewed at work, this, however, could never be mistaken for anything work related.

  8. Hmmm…the other one was “I’m sexy, but fun.” This design is “Sex is fun!” But then, as long as I’m still on the Blogroll do whatever the hell you want.

  9. I like tiara. And yes it’s because I’m a girl.

    You Ms. Crissy are HILARIOUS no matter what! I have to stop from peeing in my panties whenever I read one of your posts.

    Sorry you’re feeling down. Sending you hugs!

  10. Everyone- There’s something wrong with my Twitter!
    Not my Twidget. That’s something else…

    But it says that I only have 2 followers and all the people I was following are gone!

    It’s brokened!

    So if you were following me before, I think you have to put me back in. Fucking Twitter!

  11. I LOVE it!! In fact I am taking this pic of you and I’m going to make it MY background. That way I can let myself go, get big and fat, and no one would know.

    *opens box of twinkies*

  12. Yeah, this does make it harder for me to pull up your blog when I’m sitting in a meeting, I just have to make sure I always read it before I leave the house. But it’s a beautiful picture.

  13. Too dark. And I don’t like the way the picture stays but the text moves. Reminds me of being on a stopped train and then the train next to you starts moving and you think you’re moving.

    But still. I would like a picture of myself like that.

    The man and the boy are still gone, so I’m going back to bed now.

    As to the anxiety, I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. Really, nothing fucking helps and it’s like torture. Last week, my skin was crawling with it. CRAWLING. Horrible.

  14. You are attractive, you and your husband know this I hope. BUT, I think this REALLY cheapens the site, and detracts from what this site really is about. Which I think it is humor with a little bit of sex humor. But coming to this site with that background makes me think:
    1. This is a pornstar blog
    2. This is a stripper blog
    3. This is an escort blog
    4. I don’t want to read this site anymore.

    Just my $.02

  15. I don’t like it. I like you, obviously. You look awesome, but it reminds me of a myspace page.

    I’m being a jerk, aren’t I?

    I don’t mean it that way! Anyway, I’ve been trying to get Dane to redesign my blog for a milliondy years and he never has time. And this is what he does for a living.

    Anyway, um..you should maybe hit up Megan at nestmaker. She knows how wordpress works and could help you come up with a theme.

    See how I just volunteer your services, Megan?

    I’m just saying, she’s very good at decorating and shopping.

  16. I like the tits and ass. But the overall effect seems a little Batman. A very sexy Batman, but Batman nonetheless.

    The purple is passionate alright but your orange was more whimsical and playful. The violets tones are regal and you deserve it since you’re Queen of Fucking Everything, but against a dark backdrop the royal color takes itself too seriously.

    And, hey, dark purple is too common this year. Pantone chose Blue Iris (#18-3943) as it’s color of the year for 2008 and it is being vomited up everywhere on the internet. You deserve something more uniquely Crissy.

    I think Ken had the right idea. I like bright plum colors for you (passion, sex, power, divinity) and I’m all in favor of a photo in the sidebar or banner, but the deeper purples and dark backdrop make that passion seem sober and self-conscious, especially with an artistic b&w boudoir photo as a static background.

    So I vote that you keep the frisky, vivacious, and wanton that Ken brought in with this makeover, but you should make it brighter and, yeah, sillier.

  17. I normally ready from my greader anyway, so I say you go with whatever you like 🙂

    and yes, you’re funny no matter what your background is.

  18. Im sort of surprised that he choose that pic. I always thought it was a very deliberate choice to keep his photography of that nature and your blog seperate (Though I’ve seen most of what he posts) Overall I agree its a little too much. Especially seeing your vag. Not that its not a pretty one like a flower or something, but not the sort of thing I need as a background of a blog.

  19. Is this blog was called Beef Johnson’s circus this would work.

    I’m still searching for nudie pics.

    If someone put sex, boobs, and vagina in your search bar, it wasn’t me.

  20. Okay, seriously everybody?

    I think some of you have the impression that I like this theme and I’m keeping it. I’m sooo not keeping it. What I meant, but clearly failed to say, either that or I caught you guys skimming through, was that I don’t like it and that it’s the product of leaving my husband on his own at midnight.

    And to Geekybiker, are we looking at the same picture? I love you honey, but you can’t see my “Vag” in this picture.

    Unless I’m missing something…

    Anyway, the theme will be changed! Or maybe it is by the time you see this…

    Sheesh you guys! No tits at Crissy’s. I hear ya loud and clear.

  21. I think what Geekybiker is saying is on a wide screen, you can see all the way up to your thighs (including your “vag”, which obviously is covered.
    I couldn’t see it at work, but here at home my screen is wider (or whatever the reason) I see more of the picture here. Don’t get upset!

  22. Yes, you can for some reason I can see it here at home, but not at work. I don’t know – my computer here has a wider screen – maybe that’s why. But yea, you can see more of the picture.

  23. Yes, Lynne. That’s exactly what I meant. I have dual monitors at work in high res so I get the whole wide screen effect. You can most definitely see your panties. Set your res to 1280 or higher wide and you’ll see it. It’s the crop your hubby was talking about above.

  24. Crissy, don’t be rash. The picture is entirely beautiful, vag and all. And, also, you got a lot of pro-tits votes.

    Besides, Ken will enjoy the spanking, I’m sure.

    Geekybiker, I love you too, and now, in addition, I want your work computer.

  25. my Y chromosome makes me say “Oh Hell Yeah!” However, i expect a tiara picture to replace it soon.

    Oh well, like many things, it was good while it lasted.

  26. I’ve never been so happy to have a wide-screen monitor.

    Seriously though, I agree with whoever said they didn’t like fixed-position backgrounds. Having the background stay still while the words rush by gives me a touch of vertigo. And hey, I was a little light-headed after that pic anyway.

  27. I am so very impressed that you have a picture like this of yourself and that your hubby is the one that posted it.

    Your hubby needs to talk to my hubby. It’s time for Hubbetron to lighten up!

    You look smokin’ baby. I think I must be a man because I say GO SEXY, though it would be hilarious if you Photoshopped a jungle bush into this picture.

  28. Love the new look, love the background pic (especially on my widescreeen) but it just ain’t you is it? I mean, the orange thing was so….. in your face, “happy to be here, love you all and I’m Queen of fucking everything” This is far too much “Hello Boys, don’t listen, just watch” for you. Such a vibrant personality deserves a vibrant page. Plus of course, my wife might well object if she catches me here, at least the orange one never aroused her curiosity as to my interest in strange american women.

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