Classy, Sassy, Assy, I Can’t Come Up With a Title For This

So there’s this blogger, right?

And I really liked his blog.

I thought it was pretty funny and so I blogrolled him and he blogrolled me and I started reading and commenting and it was all kissy-kissy, nicey-nicey until I commented on a post he wrote about his birthday.

In it he wrote stuff about running around naked in his back yard and shooting porn films in his basement and some other stuff I can’t remember because it was a couple of months ago but anycrap ( I totally swiped that from Kiala. Thanks Kiala!), people wrote comments about crotchless panties and nakedness and whatnot so I wished him a happy birthday and said that since pubes turn gray when you get old I’m going to shave from now on so I never have to have that horrifying moment of finding my first gray pube.

That’s all I said, and then he emails me with this to say about my comment:

“It was the catalyst for me to make a few changes in the blog, my own habits, etc. I’m going to leave this comment out, just so I don’t rekindle the whole deal. It’ll save me some other headaches.”

That’s a direct quote from the email. I kept it because when the world starts making sense to me I read it and then the world stops making sense and everything is all screwed up again.

And then he put all comments into moderation, took down his blogroll, and put his blog on hiatus.

I’m not even kidding you.

I was all hurt and embarrassed and felt like a big loser but then I realized Hey! I’m not the asshole. He’s the asshole!

I mean he was all polite and stuff in the email, but puh. leeze. In light of what other people were saying my comment was not inappropriate and he didn’t delete anyone else’s. Just. mine. So the only way I can make sense of this is that the “whole deal” and the “headaches” he’s talking about are not all about him because he’s a guy and he’s down with pussy jokes and bad language. They all are.

I think it’s his wife.

The dude is

Pussy. Whipped.

And I think that’s gotta be the problem here because on other people’s blogs he makes comments about masturbation and he uses naughty words and he frequents blogs that are like mine. You know, vulgar and inappropriate. So my theory is that the Mrs. caught him spanking it to some porn

and decided to put the clamp down on all his Internet activities.

It’s probably that and he’s just a total asshole and a hypocrite.

I considered blogging about this when it happened but I decided to take the high road and just email gossip about it to all my blog friends because “be classy, not sassy” is my motto and also because it wasn’t worth starting a blog war even though I’d totally win because my blog is bigger than his.

But I’m blogging it today because I got an email from another blogger who is just the sweetest person in the world mostly because she called me her blog hero and she was a little hurt and embarrassed because he did it to her too. Make me feel weird, that’s fine, but he messed with one of my peeps and now I’m pissed. He said he deleted her comment due to “inappropriateness” because she made mention of her down belows.

What does this dude have against the girl parts?

And shouldn’t he warn people that he’s totally fucking lame? (actually, his blog title does sort of come right out and say that…)

I mean seriously. If you don’t want people to be inappropriate on your blog you shouldn’t write stuff that is going to inspire inappropriate comments.

Just sayin.

It makes me want to tell you all to go to his blog and holler PUSSYCUNTCOOTERTITS at him.

But I’m not going to tell you who it is but if you email me I totally will because I have class coming out of my ass.

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39 comments

  1. ooooh ooooh i know who it is!!! but i promise i won’t tell…

    -me

    ps. i love that cat porn picture.
    pps. i also love it when you talk about your down-belows. please don’t stop. ever.

  2. OOOOOOOH, I don’t know who it is. TELL ME TELL ME TELL ME. I’ll be sure to be a BIGGER asshole and leave ANONYMOUS comments on his blog. Because you know, the BIGGEST ASSHOLES OF THEM ALL leave rude and despicable comments under anonymous so no one knows who they are. And then they sit in their dark, lame corners of the world and think they are all better than everyone else. But, how the hell can you be better than everyone else if NO ONE KNOWS WHO YOU ARE?!?!? And it’s not that I care that much. Or that it’s ever happened to me. Or anything. But, you know. So, tell me, what’s the dirty scoundral’s blog?!

  3. I think that in such a big world, this douche-bag has zero control and his lot in life is to RULE SUPREME over a lame-ass blog….that’s really not that funny anyway.

    Let’s not blame the wifey and just feel bad for her as she is married to such a jackass.

  4. Neth- You’re FIRST! You’re never first. Good for you!

    Nilsa- Yeah that Anonomous guy is such a jerk! And he’s everywhere.

    Rachel- Maybe blaming his wife was a little harsh, but it’s the only way I can make sense of his cryptic email. I mean, you don’t give yourself a “headache” or “rekindle” the “whole deal” with yourself do you?

  5. Hi. Found you through another blog. Digging the first post I read.

    WTF. Seriously, maybe he is gay or something? Maybe masterbation is ok…but anything poon related is just unacceptable?

    Hard to tell. I bet I can guess…if you tell me who it is!!!!!!

  6. Hmmm. Maybe his headache isn’t in the head you’re thinking of, which could also be a wife problem. If he has issues with woman-parts, maybe he should just come out of the closet alfuckingready.

  7. Wow. So the dude blogs about all sorts of stuff but he can’t take a comment (or two) about a lady’s down below? What, he thinks he’s better than us or something? I’m going to have to agree with Lynne here (and quote her) “maybe he should just come out of the closet alfuckingready.”!!!

  8. Okay, remember when I said to use one of the titles from your blog posts as a new blog title? Yeah, this one’s not it. But that being said…WFT is wrong with this guy?! So is he still writing posts that inspire inappropriate comments that his wife then weeds through to give her stamp of approval?

  9. Tee hee… You said cooter! HA!!! HA!!

    But really, aren’t all men pussy whipped?? The cooter rules all!! Right?

  10. Lynne- I forgot all about that other head! You might be right.

    Marie- Yeah. That’s why I’m so confused.

    Dingo- Ha, ha, ha, ha. To be honest I haven’t visited his blog since so I have no idea what he’s writing about these days, but I do know that he makes some “off color” comments on other blogs so I don’t know what his deal is.

    Subie-Oh yes. Absolutely!!! You can’t blame the guy can you?

  11. I know EXACTLY who it is and I was wondering what the hell happened and that is BULLSHIT and whatever, he lives in the suburbs.

    He can’t do that to my Crissy.

    You should have emailed me. I would have stood up for you.

    You were funny and in no way inappropriate. I mean, he was part of our circle of There is No Line Bloggers, am I right?

    Ooooh, I am so mad right nw.

  12. Kiala- I knew you’d know who I was talking about. I didn’t know how to react and so I just kind of turned inward, ya know. And he did this to another one of our friends. I just don’t get him.

  13. I can’t believe he did that to another one of us. I’m just saying that if he’s going to get all moderate-y he needs to explain why. It just smacks of, well, it makes me think he thinks women’s parts are shameful but small mexican kids with AIDS and tourettes is perfectly fine to say. I would really like him to explain his line of reasoning.

    The thing is, we’re all really nice people with a wicked sense of humor (not that vaginas are wicked, but you know what I mean) and if he has something we need to be sensitive about (ie jealous wife) then he should TELL us so we can at least try to respect his wants.

    I could email you about this too but I think it’s a good idea to support you publicly.

    Because I’m very important.

  14. Matt- I can’t tell you who it is because I don’t want to give him any hits to his site. Ha!

    Chris- Agreed. Dirty girl is the worst. Other than that, who doesn’t like girl parts?

  15. Thank you for blogging about this! I couldn’t have been as funny. I’m so glad everybody’s on our side.

    Oh, and it’s 100% his wife. You called it with the pussy-whipped.

  16. And you know the thing is, it would be one thing if he deleted my one comment and that was it. But I can no longer leave comments AT ALL. You know me – I’m crazazy. Pussy this. Vagina that. I can’t be trusted.

  17. Melissa- #1. It’s not you sweetie. #2. You are a key member of There is No Line Bloggers.

    Megkathleen- I wasn’t sure if you’d want anyone to know it was you, so I left your name out. We knew everyone would be madder than wet hens didn’t we? And yes, you really need to pack it in with all the dirty pussy talk. Seriously.

  18. OH my god, I think everyone wants to know who that guy is. He sound…ridiculous. Maybe he’s uncomfortable with our “female parts.” Maybe his wife is a big lie. Ooohh.

  19. Maybe he’s gay, you know it would explain why he’s so butt hurt when girls mention their girlie bits. And Cooter is my favorite word EV-AR!

  20. OK, everybody wants to know so you might as well put up the name of this blog. You don’t need to link, just let us know.
    Especially since he is doing the same shame thing to one of your peeps.
    And I am totally in love with vaginas. If you want to post a shot of your non-grey haired – (oh, sorry, not appropriate, never mind)

  21. Denise- And it’s fun to say!

    Lynne- You are partially responsible for this.

    JoeInVegas-ha, ha, ha, ha! I’ll probably tell everyone what blog it is. I’m still having a moral battle in my head over it. We’ll see which side wins.

  22. I’m so glad you figured out the wife angle, or I would have been turning it over in my head for days, like when you see an actor you recognize but just can’t place. Thank you!

  23. I found my first grey hair a couple weeks ago. Luckily it wasn’t in my pubes.

    It may not just be the wife angle with this guy though. It may be the family angle. My Fiance is pretty cool about most stuff like that. But she has, lets called them “conservative” relatives to be generous. When they might get directed to the site we sometimes have issues. I say fuck em and let them stew about me talking about how awesome my scrotum is.

  24. Neth- Nah. I’ll do it. Maybe tomorrow.

    Megan- Ha, ha, ha! It took me two days to figure it out.

    Geekybiker- I would like to hear more about this awesome scrotum.

  25. How can it be okay to talk about crotchless panties but not to make pussy jokes? I guess the operative word is “crotchless.”

    You are so right that all men are into pussy jokes and bad language. I get happy just thinking about pussies and bad language. And the two go so well together (with other things, too)!

    Anyway, my takeaway from all of this is that I will google mexican kids with AIDS and tourettes so I can find out who this is. Also, I would shave my pubes tonight to avoid that whole gray-pube issue if my pubes weren’t already shaved.

    Hey, Crissy’s Pimp, post it!

  26. Well, I’m a defense attorney, so I have to come to this guy’s defense, of course. Let’s admit it – that blogger meets blogger honeymoon period can be pretty dang awkward. You have to struggle with the whole thing of trying to develop a relationship while at the same time keeping your distance and it’s very easy to go too far in one direction or the other. I mean I had that “nicey-nicey” thing going with my new favorite blogger and then I sent her a rambling email in which I suggested that the past 8 years would have been SO much better if only she had been in Bush’s cabinet and, since then, I’ve felt like a complete fool. I don’t know. I think I might be doing it again, so I’ll shut up now.

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