I’m depressed today because of the craptacular weather. We have snow. We have rain. We have slush. We must wear boots. We must wear hats.
Thanks weather (stupid jerk).
In my panic to leave the house this morning, I grabbed a hat and dashed out to work. Once there, I removed the hat to discover that it’s my 2 year old’s.
I am a small headed freak-lady. My hat size is not measured in inches, but in months. As in 18-24 months. It’s true.
My head isn’t so small that you’d look at me and wonder if I punked off some witch doctor somewhere and he shrunk it, but it’s small enough so that adult size hats eat my head leaving only nose and mouth uncovered, and I look like an bird-faced Olson twin in sunglasses. Only mine aren’t Chanel, they’re Hello Kitty.
Yesterday I bought some child size elastic headband thingys from Target thinking that the Charmeister and I could share them, but they’re too big for me.
So there you have it. I’ve revealed the secret of my deformity. I hope we can still be friends. Small head, big heart is what I always say.
(I have cankles too, btw)
Similar Posts:
March 1st, 2008 at 3:23 PM
First, let me say that I hope we can still be friends, because I, as you may or may not know, have a freakishly large head. That said, what the hell are cankles?
March 1st, 2008 at 3:48 PM
i’m sorry. but cankles are where i must draw the line.
March 1st, 2008 at 4:28 PM
Lynne, As someone with a deformity, I cannot hold your large head against you. Of course we can still be friends! Just as long as you don’t get your teeth done. You’d be prettier than me then and I just can’t have that. (private joke. i’m not that much of an ass, truly.) Cankles are calf/ankles. I have poorly defined ankle bones and if I so much as eat 1 single salty treat, I immediately retain enough water to puff out my ankles and obfuscate my ankle bones thereby giving the appearance of a calf that just bends into a foot. This is why I try to skip the salty snacks and opt for cake instead. Less salt, more ankle. You should have seen me when I was preggers. Oof!
Chris! No! Don’t leave me! I’ll…I’ll…have surgery! Please! We’ve only just begun!
March 1st, 2008 at 7:26 PM
Cankles huh… in that case I have thees (thighs that go right into my knees.)
March 1st, 2008 at 10:15 PM
i think your husband would agree
there is nothing wrong with a little head….
March 2nd, 2008 at 9:07 AM
Aznman, he’s turning you into HIM!
Run for your life!
March 2nd, 2008 at 4:20 PM
I’m with Aznman, there’s nothin’ wrong with a little head. I laughed my ass off when I read that. Okay, let’s get serious. You’re perfectly lovely, and I couldn’t be more proud of you.