For the safety of all involved, I considered not going to the Staff Development and Appreciation day at all. Then I remembered that food would be served. So, I risked a possible homicide and went for the food. Here’s the verdict:
Understanding Body Language Seminar: Total and utter waste of time. I didn’t need some PhD. to come and take two hours of my life to tell me that if someone is charging at me with a hunting rifle that they are tense about something. I knew that. Thanks. There wasn’t even anything interesting enough to make fun of. I learned nothing and perhaps even forgot a few things. Thankfully, I wasn’t chosen to participate in any role playing nonsense. That would have been trouble with a capital “You’re FIRED!”
I don’t think our Director and Assistant Director enjoyed the presentation either as they promptly stuffed the presenter into her coat and carried her equipment out to her car themselves. They even wrapped up her bagel for her. Buh-bye.
Food served at seminar: Bagels as big as your head that you had to risk a digit to cut into a more reasonable size. I hoped that the mayor would have something better to eat at the luncheon event to follow.
Town Employee Appreciation Holiday Luncheon with the Mayor: Decent food. The sweet potatoes were so good I wanted to bring them home, dump them into my bed, strip naked and roll around in them. The mayor came to the table to thank us for our hard work this year. It was very clear he’s never been into the library as he hadn’t the first clue what sort of work we actually did. The High School choir came to sing for us which made it impossible to talk. I guess they figured we talk to each other enough while we’re at work…
Having to go back to work after 2 hours of glassy eyed boredom and then stuffing myself Thanksgiving style: Freaking sucked ass.
Total number of calories consumed before 2:00 pm: 5,000 as a conservative guesstimate.
Body count: 0
Verdict on the day as a whole: Total success as my only goal was to get through it without killing anyone.