What kind of a pathetic loser actually takes her camera to Wal-Mart?
Me. I do. I am such a loser.
Those of you who plan to stay out of the stores this shopping season are really missing out on some truly unique gift giving opportunities. Let’s stroll down the gift aisle shall we? Click on the pictures to see these products in all their glory. Really, I don’t even have to comment (even though I will anyway).
Heiress by Paris Hilton. Wow. I’m guessing that this is the closest she’s ever come to actually being inside a Wal-Mart store. What does an heiress smell like anyway? A twat full of money?
Who said that?
An Arch of Beauty. An Arch? Of beauty? I think it’s safe to assume that this set will deliver anything BUT Beauty. Perhaps what it does promise is an emergency trip to the dermatologist.
His Sexiest Musks. As if men weren’t musky enough, here’s an interesting trio of fragrances: Armpit, Taint, and the ever-popular Balls.
Bod Man. According to the packaging, if you wear this cologne, chicks will “want your bod”. Uh huh. Guys out there, listen up. If you have trouble getting a little action, you’ve apparently been wearing the wrong fragrance. This is the stuff you need to have all the fly girlies on your jammie.
A camouflage grooming kit. Ideal for the hunter who likes to look his best while slaughtering innocent fuzzy woodland creatures.
A reindeer that shits jellybeans. There are no words…
Nothing says “White Trash” quite like a commemorative Elvis Pez dispenser. Actually, three says it even better.
Here’s our girl! Entertain today the Rachel way…by slipping a little cocaine into the artichoke dip.
Ahhhh…I just love a good hot cock in the morning! Maybe if I had one of these bad boys, the people at work would quit stealing my cup.
This is actually kind of cute and I wouldn’t puke if someone gave it to me, but does anyone ever actually use these things?
Meats and cheeses requiring no refrigeration whatsoever. Scares the bejeezus out of me. And, wait, does that say Ham-A-Rama on the price tag in the corner?
These were only a few of the fantastic things I saw on my shopping adventure. I’m usually a Target kind of girl, but I found myself at Wal-Mart instead because I decided to go slumming.
I’m so glad I did!
Now you all know what you’re getting for Christmas! I don’t even have to wrap it!
- A Vibrating Condom. A Vibrating Condom?
- Oh, for the love of gawd, eBay! Seriously, WTF?
- Crissyspage Best Gift Pics 2008!
- We went to Ikea this weekend. I’d have a better title for this but the baby is being a total bag right now because for some reason, she doesn’t want to lay in her crib and stare at her birdie mobile for an hour. Weird.
- Everybody wants a piece of Crissy OR An emo post about Crissy feeling like a dishrag and getting no sympathy